*hides good snacks from family members*
there’s a word for that
hello my name is maggie and im a defensive eater..
hello maggie and welcome to defensive eaters anonymous now who took all the cookies
That would be the most stressful meeting to supply snacks for.
(via signisdashiz)Source: foodchewer
We teach kids to fear animals like rats, snakes, spiders, etc. that are harmless 99% of the time but do we ever warn them about the real danger
WHY DOES IT HAVE TEETH ON ITS TONGUE
I am a gooseologist and I can tell you that geese live on a healthy diet of children’s souls which can only be properly chewed with unholy tongue teeth
(via connie-green)Source: zagreus-taking-time-apart
So I’m sure you recognize this as one of the epic moments from “The Prince of Egypt” where we see the super majestic whale as they cross through the Red Sea. However I noticed just one little issue: whale tales don’t move from side to side, they move up and down. And then it hit me, that’s not a whale. That’s not a whale. It’s a motherfucking SHARK. A BIG ASS MEGALODONIAN SHARK. WAITING IN THE WATER TO EAT THE PHARAOH’S SOLDIERS. Goddamn, Dreamworks.
(via all-systems-no)Source: erlynntheemerald
Ways to kill your enemies
I know way too much about killing people because of this website
I STILL DON’T UNDERSTAND HOW THESE INVISIBLE BALLS ARE SUPPOSED TO KILL YOU???? 250K NOTES DOES ANYBODY ACTUALLY KNOW
by swallowing the water without the knowledge of the balls’ presence, you’re basically destined to choke on them
bubble tea of death
Bubble tea of death
Also the marbles absorb water, so once they get inside you, they’ll start expanding even more and basically take all the fluid out of your body and you’ll very slowly dehydrate to death.
i have these and i put them in my cousin’s water and she spit them out and choked me
did you just try to murder your cousin?